Awake {Advent Day 6}

I squinted my eyes to look at my bedside clock. 5:20am. Not my usual wake up time. I lay there for a while this morning. Not quite ready to get up. Not able to fall back asleep.

I remember the Advent word of the day: Awake.

My mind begins to think of Mary. I wonder how many sleepless nights she had these last weeks of pregnancy? I wonder if she woke up while it was still dark, pondering all of it?

I quietly come downstairs. I let myself feel the aloneness. Sitting in the dark. While everyone else is still sleeping. Did Mary feel alone? Did the presence of Christ with her give her unexplainable peace? Was it a mixture of the two?

The light begins to come through our windows. Soon our house will begin to awake. I want to hold onto the stillness a bit longer. To allow my soul to awake before my body and mind have to jump into action.

Grateful for some margin. To awake the most important parts. To be wide-eyed to the beauty of it all.

May we today slow down in order to remember. To anticipate. To wonder.

To be awake to the marvelous mystery.