Nothing Gold Can Stay- Day 7

Nothing Gold Can Stay

Nature’s first green is gold,

Her hardest hue to hold.

Her early leaf’s a flower;

But only so an hour.

Then leaf subsides to leaf.

So Eden sank to grief,

So dawn goes down to day.

Nothing gold can stay.

Robert Frost (1923)

As we enter the second week of 31 Days of Noticing Fall, we enter into noticing leaves. Their symbolism of the cycle of life. Of dying. Of hope of new life.

I knew that at some point in this series, I would share of our miscarriages. As I looked ahead at the theme of fall leaves, I knew it was to be this week. Our own fall season of dying. Of our children’s deaths. Of our death of hope and dreams.

What I did not plan on is this: Today marks five years that we flew to Guatemala to bring home our son. Sunday,  October 7th, 2007.  The first time the days of the week of our trip has lined up with the date.

It brought me to tears. Realizing God would have the writing on this season of loss, be the week we mark our son coming home. God is his timing and his way. Showing death. Showing life. Sorrow. Joy. Intermingled.

Join me this week.  Remembering our plane landing tonight.The day he turned eight months old. Remembering going to bed tonight, anticipating our son’s foster mom putting him in our arms tomorrow.

Remembering discovering we are pregnant. And again and again. And again and again and again. Remembering the moments when the story went dark and there was no heartbeat.

Remembering the most intense Fall season of our life. Remembering the hope that surfaces through wrestling. Remembering the celebration of a long road to becoming parents.

I would be honored to have you explore and remember with me.

Today marks Day 7. If you have missed a post, you can find links to all of them here.

Does the opening poem sound familiar? If so, you are either a Robert Frost fan. Or you remember it from the book or movie by S.E. Hinton, The Outsiders.

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